1. Only two substitutes may play for a rink, otherwise the points for the game will be awarded to the opposite rink.  Substitutes need not be the same ones as used before.
2. The substitute may play up to and including the position of the person they are replacing.
3. A team playing with only three players shall not forfeit the match, but be penalised by two shots for the first end of the match.  If the missing player does not turn up by the end of the second end, the team will forfeit a further two shots.  The maximum penalty for non-appearance of a team-member is therefore four shots.

4. For all games, players who are unable to play must arrange a substitute and notify the skip.
   N.B.  Use the reserve list to find substitute before contacting any other playing member.

5. The member originally selected is responsible for the (pre-paid) Ice Fees.
   Reserves from the list are responsible for a £5.00 Ice Fee to be paid either to a Committee Member or to the Club Treasurer.

6. The signed score cards should be returned to the Match Secretary or placed in the box provided on the Club notice board at Greenacres Ice Rink.
   N.B.  Team members' names must be filled in clearly and substitutes indicated.

7. The Club colours are Black, Gold, and White.  Members are asked to show their support by wearing their colours.

After the game, a rather bizarre conversation took place in the bar about how things could have turned out differently.  It was pointed out that had one of George's 3 substitutes been assassinated prior to turning out on the ice, CLUB RULE 3 above, (which states that, "A team playing with only three players shall not forfeit the match, but be penalised by one shot every five minutes up to a maximum of six shots after 30 minutes"), would apply.

Strangely enough, it was whilst acting as a time clock umpire at one Scottish Championship where the players are very much aware that every second could count, that I wondered what time might be saved if club curlers had to play under the same conditions. A nice thought but totally unrealistic!

As an experiment, I decided to time a Province KO final one year (the astute reader will have worked out that our rink had been shown the door in an earlier round!). I noted the time from the bell to first stone being thrown, any time in excess of 30 seconds between ends (the time allowed when time-clocks are used) and times when the players were not ready in the hack when the skips had decided the next shot. A staggering seven minutes and fifty-four seconds had been wasted and that was without making any judgments on 'Committee Meetings'! You will not be surprised to learn only seven ends were played and the bell went whilst the thirds were throwing.

Section D: Rule 5(b) (iii) states "Each player shall be ready to play when his turn comes and shall not take more than a reasonable time to play."

So what about all curlers, experienced as well as new, making the following New Year resolution for 2005?

• If the ice is ready, make your way to your allotted sheet, perform the formalities and have your practice slides so you are ready to throw the first stone when the bell goes.
• When an end is completed the lead throwing first leaves sorting the team's stones to the second and third and concentrates on getting his stone ready in the hack. If you are a team who like to play the same stones throughout the game, skips can make this easier if, when one of their own stones goes out of play during an end, they arrange them in roughly the right order at the back of the house. How many skips do this?
• If you use a slider, don't wait until the opposition stone has come to rest before deciding to put it on, or, even worse, find then that you have left it at the other end!

The above may only save a few seconds each time but it all soon adds up. However, before you think our top players are perfect here, I have observed over a number of years that the leads are usually ready within the prescribed 30 seconds before their team's clock is restarted, but the skips manage to take an additional 11-12 seconds deciding whether to ask for a stone short or one in the house!

All curlers can do better - so are you just a time-waster?

1. I will arrive at the ice rink in good time for my game.
2. I will always be ready in the hack when it is my turn to play my shot. Surely one of the most annoying things for a skip is when his teammates faff around looking for their slider/knee pad/stone when it is their turn to play? Just be ready, please!
3. Ditto skips at the other end! If I am ready in the hack, so should you be!
4. I will never stand behind the opposition skip in such a way as to distract the player. Here are some tips on this thorny subject:
• Have the brush behind you or hold it horizontally
• Do not move or twitch
• Do not suddenly have a pressing desire to walk around
• Do not jump up and down
• Shoo team mates away to their proper place (between the two hoglines - it's in the rules of the game, matey!), unless it is your third, in which case, he or she can stand quietly with you at the appropriate time.
• Oh - and another thing. If my game has finished, but another game is carrying on, or if I need the measure, or I have a pressing need to go and powder my nose, I will never walk behind the skip on another sheet until the player there has thrown their stone!
5. I will always arrange my own substitute and let my teammates and skip know that I have done so. If I am in a major competition, I promise to have discussed any attendance problems in advance with my skip. I will then make the necessary phone calls and arrangements.
6. I will never let my brush touch the ice surface in the house until the opposition stone has reached the tee line. Then I will sweep to my heart's content!
7. I will always wear clean shoes and make sure all of my equipment is clean.
8. I will never collapse in a heap on the ice after I have thrown my stone, leaving all manner of melted ice and bits of fluff, dirt and muck behind me. Furthermore, I will not complain when, having done so, a large red-faced individual runs dementedly up to me, lifts me bodily off the ice and throws me outside the building and into the path of some fast-moving oncoming vehicles. Indeed, I will thank said individual for making me a better person.
9. In fact, I will go further! I confirm that the only bits of me that will touch the ice throughout a game will be my shoes, my brush head and (I am getting older now, so bear with me, please) my knee. Unless I fall, in which case, exceptions can be made.
10. I will always respect my opponents - win, lose or draw.
11. I will encourage my teammates if they throw a bad stone. I mean - it is not as if they thought to themselves, 'I fancy a rollicking - let's throw a howler!' They are feeling bad enough as it is.
12. I will keep my temper at all times. (Ouch!)
13. I will always go to the bar for a drink and chat after the game.
14. And finally, I will try to maintain the traditions and lore of the game in every way I can.

I think I better just give up now!
 

(Thanks to Bob Cowan, editor of the Scottish Curler magazine, for permission to republish Alan Stanfield's "[Rock Rules] - What a Waste of Time" article from the January 2005 edition of the magazine.  Thanks also to Bob for permission to republish Robin Copland's "[Behind the Glass] - New Year Resolutions Not For Me" article from the same edition.)   © Bridge of Weir Curling Club - 2005